MU – In The Classroom

I’ve been reading a web based story called Tales of MU for a long time now. It started back in the days when I was googling around for bad Harry Potter rip offs (of which there are many) and was conducting a search on “magical university”.

MU features some of my favorite elements: nerdy jokes, shameless fantasy, great world building and the opportunity to follow a writer who just keeps upping the standard.

Recently the author ended the chapter with:

“How about you tell me? YOU are in the class… vote between the two topics in the comments!”

…which inspired me to write what must be my first piece of FAN FICTION!

I find it increasingly difficult to keep my mouth shut during class. It’s like I have this big ugly friend called “Blurt” who’s sitting next to me only he is not. In fact he is IN me and when he needs to get something said it comes out of my mouth. Luckily Blurt is not as stupid as the name may suggest which got me through most of my school days with people thinking I’m just a bright, if rather socially incompetent, kid. Not that I ever lacked friends, you know. Turns out people some people know Blurt by his middle name “Honesty”. Having a middle name and a first name I figured he would need a last name too. You know, in case some cleric one day would ask his name before driving him out of my body (if only). So I named him “Blurt Honesty Shutthefuckup”. Because if you say it fast enough it comes out sort of like “Blurt, honestly, shut the fuck up”. Blurt thinks that’s funny too.

As the lecture-turned-skirmish unfolded I was doing my best to keep Blurt from sharing some of his more colourful opinions on the format of the class to him… ourself. Luckily Blurt, like me, is easily distracted from telling the truth if there’s interesting knowledge to be had. Hall and Hart did manage to keep our interest stimulated as they swashbuckled through an attempt at defining their respective disciplines. History and Lore. Blurt is of the opinion it should be Lore and History and I think I agree with him.

The professors, one attempting to stomp on as many toes as possibly without appearing to do so and the other stomping on all toes available seemingly without knowing so, arrived at a place where the rough definition was that lore is oral and history is recorded. While they moved on to an actual example Blurt was still considering this definition and I was having a hard time focusing on what Hart and Hall had to say about the Thyleans and their roaming.

It seems to us… me that the real difference between Lore and History (in that order) is that Lore travels forward in time while History travels backwards. A piece of Lore originates in the past and moves forward as it is passed on (or it dies out) it may travel a long way and it may even change but it’s point of origin will always be in the past (unless, Blurt interjects, it was started yesterday or even last week in which case we call it a rumour).

History on the other hand travels backwards in time. From the present history is examined and traced backwards. Its point of origin is the present. But then again the present, and thus our perspective, is always in motion. Most of the historical records are constantly being rewritten as information turns out to be false, have a different meaning or just cease to be relevant.

Why did we sign up for this class again?

After some time even the oblivious Hall seemed to sense that they were talking in circles. I was having a hard time keeping Blurt from offering bets on the inevitable fight to the death to the people seated around me (Hall was obviously your classic wizard style type while Hart seemed like the roguish sort, wild mage perhaps or maybe just an useless scholar. Well, you never know). So I was very pleased when they decided to involve the class. The voting strategy surprised me but Blurt and I pretty much agreed on what our preference were: the Thylean age of exploration.

In the seats around us people were already whispering excitedly amongst themselves. Or rather a lot of people were exclaiming “DRAGONS!”. The sound echoing eerily through a dozen of near empty craniums. Surprising move for the old sagely man to be using such cheap pop-culture tricks. I kinda liked him more for it. Hart might have my academic respect but anyone showing such blatant antagonism does deserve a kick to the nuts (I crossed out my “roguish sort” doodle of the Hart/Hall duel).

I attempted to join in on the conversation but as I put forward the notion that historical events on a large scale was more interesting than monster trivia I was met with a pun. Knowing better than to let Blurt loose in an environment like that I quickly excused myself and went to use the toilets.

When I got back the vote seemed to be over with and I settled down in my seat. Excited to, at least, see how the two professors were going to conduct the discussion part of the class. Even more excited, by which I mean terrified, to see how Blurt was going to conduct himself.


2 responses

  1. Helen Rees

    I like this – I’d read more. Subject to AE declaring a fatwa…

    typo alert – it’s point of origin
    ‘Belonging to it’ is ‘its’ – no apostrophe.


    It’s = it is.

    May 10, 2011 at 12:18

    • Thank you 🙂

      May 10, 2011 at 13:35

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